(This post was written near the November New Moon, enjoy!)
Good day! I am writing this post to help encourage new parents, or new homeschoolers to find their rhythm. Rhythm really begins with the parent. If the parent is all over the place, like a squirrel, well the children just might be all over the place, like a squirrel. I experience this with my children. I also think the Moon and planetary events affect the child and family as well. Yesterday was a New Moon, for example, and the energies were pretty wild, erractic if you will. The energy usually during the New Moon can be focused on the persons shadow side. So, if you are a parent and your shadow side is yelling, well, yelling may emerge more so. The reason why we have this separation place, is because we as humans are trying to transcend this experience. Our shadow side emerges to give us the opportunity to recognize it and let it go. To release yourself of a pattern. The pattern was inherited or adapted. Since you know this now, and as the New Moon approaches, be conscious of your actions. If you feel yourself begin to yell, take a deep breath and try a new method, like waiting to discuss, instead of re-acting. The New Moon is also about new beginnings. It is the first phase of the moon cycle, so that goes hand in hand with beginning a new way to handle what is going on. The concept of relating the moon to parenting is just a way of showing interconnectedness with our planet and all that is beyond our planet. All that we can see and cannot see serve as mirrors for us, if we are willing to see our reflection.
Moving on. The Native Americans among many cultures have a way of following the year and the rhythms of nature to help guide them. To them and to my family it is called The Medicine Wheel. Picture a circle divided into four sections. Each section is a Season. Beginning with Spring, which means the birth of the cycle. The sprouting of seeds. New Beginnings. Secondly, Summer is about growth. Maturation. It is also the time of Purifying yourself. Expansion and growing pains are symptoms. Do you remember as a child getting growing pains? It hurt. The third part of the Wheel of Life is Fall. Harvest time. Whatever intentions you planted in Spring, were you to have tended that garden through Summer, then you might, just might be harvesting around the fall time. Fall is also a time for introspection. Going within. Just like the bear going in its den and slowing its heart rhythm. It is time to tend the Inner Self. Now Winter is the fourth and final Season before we begin again. I believe what is behind Winter is hardest for most people. The concept of death. There are parts of us that no longer serve what it is we are doing, or who we are. That part of us must go away, or die, so we can move on and birth new changes within us. Part of this process might involve mourning and greiving. It is ok to mourn or grieve parts of yourself that must fall away. BUT, we must move on. Death is a natural part of the process, and when we experience on this level it is known as a little death.
To keep the Wheel turning and explain it another way is to start at Spring again. Spring is the time of our youth. When we are young and on our Hero’s Journey as Carl Jung might say. The time we seek adventure and what is out in the world. Summer is the time of growth, when we try-on the many things we sought before to see if they fit. If they do not fit we shed them and try something new. Fall is the time of the teacher. When we have had our adventures, tried them all on for size and grown with them. Now we turn to teach others who stand before us. Winter is the time we settle back down again in old age and prepare for our big death. We still support and are supported, but the cycle is about to renew itself again. As someone who works with Hospice occasionally and sees actively dying folks, I will say that many of these Elders act much like new babies being born. I can relate these two things, because I also am a doula. A doula is someone caring for parents during labor emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically. States of consciousness of a newborn and of an elder in the process of dying can very much relate. They Shift. I have seen it with my own eyes on both sides.
We are all born at some point on this Wheel I speak of. Where our point of entry is determines what we need to work on, or we look to the opposite part of the Wheel and try to balance…moving ourselves toward the middle. Middle road, right! Most of you have heard that concept. I hope that makes sense. If you want to further your studies, see the book The Medicine Wheel, by Sunbear and Wabun. It is tribal. Other cultures have very similar concepts, so find what ultimately works for you.
This whole concept is an art. Life is a process. We have these rites of passage and directions. The creative part is left up to us. How does Creator create through you? Sometimes I feel as though I am a door keeper, an assistant. guardian even. Like the person who is waiting for you in an elevator. I push the button you are arriving at, and smile. Sometimes a conversation or an experience occurs. Sometimes there is a silence. We all have roles, this seems to be one of mine. That is because we are multi-dimensional, or headed that way in our consciousness.
I have enjoyed weaving the web of time and rhythm and sharing with you, but I wanna bring back our thoughts to simplicity. Finding rhythm has cycles that can be broken down. I spoke about the Seasons, so let’s speak of days and hours. Our weeks do not have to pack every single thing into every single day. Here is how we can distribute the load. I have taken a passage from THE FIRST LITTLE HOUSE BOOKS, Winter Days In The Big Woods.
“Wash on Monday,
Iron on Tuesday,
Mend on Wednesday,
Churn on Thursday,
Clean on Friday,
Bake on Saturday,
Rest on Sunday.”
For us our days have flowed better if we wake and have breakfast. Take care of hygiene and chores, then play. My children are very active and energetic. Everyone agrees that play needs to come first, before we calm ourselves a bit to integrate different learning. Ofcourse waking and moving into a calm dance of creating breakfast is an excellent way for kids to transition from sleep to active day. From birth it is about development immersion. I may sit for an hour and knit quietly. As a mother I have found it helps me center myself as the boys jig and play around me. I put myself in the eye of the storm, if you will. Even sewing on the machine. Eventually they approach and want to see what I am doing. They may even suprise me by completely immitating me to the T. Totally amazing they absorbed so much. With dad, they Witness woodworking and creating, or fixing and praying. We don’t always discuss our schedule, and we certainly do not live and die by the clock. When I am among friends we use the expression, Indian Time. That means we rise and eat around Sunrise, we sup at midday, dine at sunset, bringing things back to rest. Again a circular concept.
I spoke a moment ago about the how, the process of life. The journey. Two ways my children and I move through our journey is to dance and sing our Walk. Song and verse can be very influencial. It is not long, and dance follows. Certain days of the week or sometimes many days in a row we dance and sing. If it flows we don’t inhibit the creation of movement. One intention of mine is to schedule our Fridays for music and dance, so we can transition into having dad at home for two days in a row. Our rhythm changes to include another member of the pack, during waking hours. The family has quite a few albums to move through. Mornings or transition times are good for short songs or verses. Dance and song remind us of water moving. Song and dance can help us flow through twists and turns of life, like water moves around and over rocks in a river. What the family and I have also found is were one to begin this action with blockages in the heart or body, once you dance or sing for a while, it all clears out.
The most important issue about rhythm and time/space is to leave yourself room to unfold. Don’t get the expectations so high, so you can never succeed. Shoot for the middle. You’ll stretch, and change and shift. Ebb and flow, inhale and exhale. Let’s be kind to ourselves and our fellows along the way. Gratitude, humility and a centered heart helps.
http://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/11/04/back-to-basics-rhythm/ A really good list and a bunch of questions about Rhythm in your day.
http://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/04/30/the-adult-will-and-how-to-develop-it/ In the comment section of this post, there are exercises to developing your Will, Rudolf Steiner and otherwise.
http://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/04/20/how-do-i-instill-inner-discipline-in-my-child/ Excellent post on the different age levels and what the children are experiencing. A good place to start anyway.